Posts Tagged ‘Drunk


House Parties, Biz Markie, and failed excitment.

Last night after watching the Lakeshow move on to the NBA Finals, and having a great dinner with great people, my friends knew of a party going on.  We were very merry with intoxication so doing the responsible thing we called a cab.  For some reason every time I get in a cab, I think that Biz Marke and his infamous Heinekin commercial song will come across the radio.   Some guy in the back seat will start to sing all the words, and when the chorus comes on the cabbi will crank up the radio and everyone will sing “you, you got what I need, but you say he’s just a friend, etc…..” Yet somehow this never happens and life is never as cool as the commercials.

So we roll up to the street where the apartment is and call a friend from inside to come guide us to the party.  As we walk through the door, there is a whole house party going on.  Being two years out of college, I quickly get back to the days of attending one of these at least once a week.  I reach into my bag of beers and pop one open.  Since I do not know anyone at this party, I have two options, I can be that awkward guy who walks around that party from group to group and try to blend or I can stay home with my crew and play it safe.  I decide with the second of the two options and keep it fly.

Looking around the party you could see who was there to just chill, spit game, get wasted, and just have fun.  It is always interesting in these settings because the kitchen is neutral turf (the cocktail area), then there is the line to the bathroom and then everyone is segregated into their circles and comfort groups.  After mingling in the living room, me and my buddy decided to over take the turf outside, it was prime real estate.

After dominating the balcony and meeting virtually everyone at the party we decided to bounce.  We called a cab and headed back to home.  About half way home on the radio I hear “have you ever met a girl that you tried to date”.  I got super excited, the commercial was going to happen in this cab ride.  I was the dude sitting up front playing air drums, my buddy Zack was in the back getting ready to rap, and the two girls were getting ready to chime in.  It was going to be perfect, and then came the chorus the Cabbi was going to turn up the volume and we were all going to sing in the most heinous voices and have a blast.

Only this did not happen, the song did not occur I just made all of that up.  Sorry to get your hopes up but, this is what happens every time I step into a cab.  The next time you ride in a cab, think of me and think of Biz Markie just a friend.  One of us are bound to get lucky.


Southwestern Law School…….FAIL

Last night my cousin and I went to Banderas.  Banderas is a fairly swanky restaurant that has a bar in the center of it all.  They also have a killer beef dip.  Anyhow my cousin and I were glancing around the circular bar people watching.  It seemed as though there were plenty of very old men with fairly young and attractive women with them.
I did not realize that Banderas was a show case to display your trophy wife.  Anyhow there was a group of three people sitting to the left of me.  There were two mid twenties a guy and girl having a drink with their father.  This mid twenties guy was hammered a super annoying.  Halfway through my dinner they were met by a friend closer to the age of the father.  This friend was carrying a stack of blue books.

Later on overhearing them talk I found out that this guy was a law professor at Southwestern Law School in Los Angeles.  He was holding his law classes final exams.  The drunk annoying dude was also a law graduate and asked to take a look at the exams.  He drunkenly started passing them around to people at the bar and belittleling the students.  Everything from degrading there handwriting to taking a pen and writing crude remarks in the blue books.

This got me curious if any of my college professors ever took my blue books to a bar and passed them around for Joe Schmoe to mock and belittle?  If so, hopefully it helped me get a better grade.  I was just amazed that a law professor would do such a thing.  I like to think that if these students are attending law school, then they were very serious about getting a good grade.  Should a teacher have the ability to take these out in public and let people mock the students?  I don’t know about you, but that just seems irresponsible and unprofessional. Way to live up to that tier 3 ranking Southwestern Law School….

Southwestern Law, FAIL…….


Are you drunk right now?

According to Maxim magazine at any given moment around the world there are 46, 948,952 people drunk.  Now that is a shit show.

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