Posts Tagged ‘beer


Wonder Bitch and the pushover

Have you ever been put on blast, got ripped apart, or plain old chewed out?  I am sure this happens to the best of us during some point in our lives.  This past Friday, I witnessed this first hand.  Let me describe the scene before I go into the story.  For those of you who are not familiar or to scared to venture down towards the Santa Monica area, there is a slew of great restaurants.  Last Friday, I was fortunate enough to get together with some long time friends and have a couple of cocktails.

We decided to post up at Ma Kai’s.  Ma Kai’s is a very nice, laid back restaurant with a great bar.   Ma Kai’s signature has been their Mojitos.  In the past, they would fill your glass to the brim with crushed ice accompanied by a stick of sugar cane, and then pour in that luscious minty concoction.  These things are strong and deadly.

MaKai lounge

Ma'Kai lounge

Upon ordering several cocktails and appetizers, my attention was drawn to the table next to us.  There was a couple there who looked around their mid twenties.  The girl looked like your typical blond from southern Kaliphornya.  Dressed to impress, with a bag and outfit that probably cost more than her car.  The guy, well my friends and I had a good time ripping into him.  This is what we do, we belittle people when they can not hear us.  Aren’t we nice.  Anyhow the guy had pushover dork written all over him.  He had shorter hair that was parted to the side similar to the hair cut my father has.  You know that one your mom used to make you wear on picture day in first grade?  He was wearing an undershirt below a pink lacoste shirt, both tucked into his khakis.  This all went along perfectly with his Topsiders.

So, what grabbed my attention?  I head this girl yelling as though she were telling a story.  I then listened even closer and realized she was chewing this dude out.  I do not know why, but full on yelling at this guy in a nice restaurant for everyone to wittiness.  She was saying stuff to him that blew my mind.  This whole time Peter preppy, was siting there like a gentle man, eating his fries and taking this lashing.  Not an ounce of emotion from him.  This bitch session must have gone on for a good thirty minutes.

To make the story even better this couple probably ordered three or four different appetizers.  After polishing off their sweet potato fries, calamari, and two of the three sliders, Betty the bitch made a scene.  She brought the manager of the restaurant over and started in on him.  To quote her she said “I want my money back, your sliders did not have lettuce on them!”  The manager told her that these sliders were award winners for the area, and that they do not put lettuce on them.  She blew up at this dude for another ten minutes.  Eventually she got the whole bill comped and stormed out of the restaurant.

I was in utter shock how rude and bitchy this chick was.  What was even worse was how her boyfriend just took it.  Anyhow I guess some people just don’t have manners, or a backbone.  On that note, the next time you are out, keep it classy.


Portable Keg

This could be the coolest homemade contraption I have ever seen regarding a keg.  Check this one out below and then go home and make one this weekend and let your American pride reign…..


House Parties, Biz Markie, and failed excitment.

Last night after watching the Lakeshow move on to the NBA Finals, and having a great dinner with great people, my friends knew of a party going on.  We were very merry with intoxication so doing the responsible thing we called a cab.  For some reason every time I get in a cab, I think that Biz Marke and his infamous Heinekin commercial song will come across the radio.   Some guy in the back seat will start to sing all the words, and when the chorus comes on the cabbi will crank up the radio and everyone will sing “you, you got what I need, but you say he’s just a friend, etc…..” Yet somehow this never happens and life is never as cool as the commercials.

So we roll up to the street where the apartment is and call a friend from inside to come guide us to the party.  As we walk through the door, there is a whole house party going on.  Being two years out of college, I quickly get back to the days of attending one of these at least once a week.  I reach into my bag of beers and pop one open.  Since I do not know anyone at this party, I have two options, I can be that awkward guy who walks around that party from group to group and try to blend or I can stay home with my crew and play it safe.  I decide with the second of the two options and keep it fly.

Looking around the party you could see who was there to just chill, spit game, get wasted, and just have fun.  It is always interesting in these settings because the kitchen is neutral turf (the cocktail area), then there is the line to the bathroom and then everyone is segregated into their circles and comfort groups.  After mingling in the living room, me and my buddy decided to over take the turf outside, it was prime real estate.

After dominating the balcony and meeting virtually everyone at the party we decided to bounce.  We called a cab and headed back to home.  About half way home on the radio I hear “have you ever met a girl that you tried to date”.  I got super excited, the commercial was going to happen in this cab ride.  I was the dude sitting up front playing air drums, my buddy Zack was in the back getting ready to rap, and the two girls were getting ready to chime in.  It was going to be perfect, and then came the chorus the Cabbi was going to turn up the volume and we were all going to sing in the most heinous voices and have a blast.

Only this did not happen, the song did not occur I just made all of that up.  Sorry to get your hopes up but, this is what happens every time I step into a cab.  The next time you ride in a cab, think of me and think of Biz Markie just a friend.  One of us are bound to get lucky.


Are you drunk right now?

According to Maxim magazine at any given moment around the world there are 46, 948,952 people drunk.  Now that is a shit show.


Football is coming to the USofA…..

Ladies and gentlemen, lads and lasses, boys and girls, get ready.  Yes, get ready because football is coming to the states.  Not the football you are thinking of, but the original football also known as soccer.  Some of Europes premier soccer teams have scheduled matches against one another to show the JV (MLS) teams of soccer how it is done. 

This summer Chelsea, AC Milan, Inter Milan, and Club America will tour around the nation at some of the most popular venues we have.  United States do you realize that we will get to see the great David Beckham grace us with his presence and soccer brilliance playing for AC Milan?  Ohh wait we already saw him, he is old, slow, and really overrated.  Anyhow back to the venues.  This will include the Rose Bowl in Pasadena (USC’s home away from home even though UCLA plays there every other weekend), The Georgia Dome in the dirty South,  MT&T Bank Stadium in Baltimore (give a big cheer for Michael Phelps its where he is from and probably smoked his first bowl), Cheater Stadium, uhh I mean Gillette Stadium in Foxboro Mass, Stanford Stadium in Palo Alto CA, and the new Cowboy stadium in Arlington Texas which I heard has the worlds largest LCD monitor 130 yards long by 30 yards high.

Even though the summer time is preseason for all the European clubs we Americans can expect to see a great show, compared to the chicken scratch that we are used to seeing.  I guess you could say that I am just really excited to witness real soccer in person.   Several summers ago when Chelsea came to the states and  played against the American club, viewing records were crushed for a soccer game.  More than 900,000 Americans tuned in to watch the American all star team go head to head against the high spending and ever famous Chelsea. People were interested.

Did I mention that I can not wait to go out to Pasadena and watch some world class soccer.  Instead of having to watch world class soccer by playing Fifa 09 I get to see it live, I have never seen how the real deal plays live.  It should be some great entertainment.  Hopefully this sixth preseason tour of the states for Chelsea and the other European teams will continue to grow the American soccer world.

I am still very jealous of the guy that can go down to his local pub that is packed and watch his favorite club play in the company of all his mates and fans.  That will be the day when soccer truly is a hit here.  We need more pubs and better soccer.  Europe, do you have any ideas on how to progress soccer out here and make it the way you guys have it, the way the game should be played?  I would love some ideas…..

Stay tuned for United States tour updates…….


Saint Pattys day in Mobile Alabama

Happy Saint Patricks day everyone.  Watch this video are these people really serious?

OR maybe its a crack head-


Kaliphornya went to the ultimate dive bar last night…..


I am still pretty bad about not taking pictures in these bizarre places I end up.  Last night I drove down to Buena Park to meet up with some old friends who were in town for work.  We shot the shit and drank some beer.  Our adventures led us to the CUP.  The CUP is probably the biggest dive bar I have ever seen.  The street that the CUP was on is out of a weird movie from the 1980’s.  There was a restaurant/show of pirates called Pirates Dinner Adventure.  

Pirates Dinner Adventure

Pirates Dinner Adventure


Medieval Times

Medieval Times












Then the next building was called Medieval Times Dinner Restaurant.  Needless to say this was a strange place to be.  Across the street from CUPS was a restaurant called Po Boys Restaurant.  Walking into the bar there was no one at the door taking cards which was a different feel from your typical Los Angeles scene.  

CUPS like Rush Street Grill was a very weird mix of people.  There you had the blue collar crowd which was a nice change from your typical Lost Angeles crowd.  I saw a girl wearing basketball shorts knee high socks and flip flops.  It looked like she just got done shooting hoops and came straight to the bar.  

When we walked up to the bar we got three beers for a grand total of 13 dollars.  This was a very cheep price to pay for the size of beers.  There was also free pool which is awesome even thou I suck.  When you looked around the place you really saw the true dive bar come out.  On the walls there were cpu print offs that gave prices for food.  You could buy a hot pocket for $3.00, Beer Nuts for $2.00, and there were free Nachos.  In the corner of the bar there was a machine keeping your nacho cheese warm next to a basket of chips.  There was also a microwave next to the pool tables.  I bet if you ordered a hot pocket they would give it to you frozen and you could heat it up to your own liking.  

The music that was bumping was all over the place. It went from Irish drinking songs, to Chris Brown, to Boston.  There was a makeshift dance floor that no one was using.  If you stepped on it I bet the music would stop everyone would turn their head and freeze.  You could probably stand still and hear crickets.  The locals were just not used to these cats coming on their home turf.  After a beer or two we went back to the cars and I made my journey back to the West side.  

It was a interesting place to say the least, does anyone want to go to Pirates Dinner Adventure?  Its 45 bucks a person and it includes dinner and a show-

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